Wednesday, May 11, 2011

We come in through the toilet




How come these fellers is in their PJ's?

This is the elite Swiss Guard, sworn to protect the pope.

Didn't mean to wake you fellers up. Hmmm. How comes the pope in Allentown?

Allentown? This is the South Pole Vatican. ... And I'll ask the questions, thank you. ... How did you get in here?

Mmm. We come in through that gold toilet.

The toilet? You were sent by St. Onslo?


Indeed we were. However that T-shirted pietist has sent us to the wrong location.

We're supposed to be in Allentown to fight the demon Marge. ... You are aware that you're a scarecrow?

Allentown? Wait second. ... Atown? ... Are you associated with Atown Liker?

Indeed we are. I am his loyal servant, the Green Guy.

I'm Karl. I was his gardener till Ol' Marge fired me for killin' the Player with a kaiser blade. Mmm. At least that's what I call it.


And I'm Truman the former ghost friend and confidant of the aforementioned demon who stole his blog and his house and tried to kill him and destroy Allentown.

And I am Mrs. Egram, the palindromatic doppelganger of that demon. I have traveled from an alternate timeline created through the incompetence of these maladroit time-traveling buffoons. I intend to seek revenge upon Marge, who, I am told, ate my little brother in her timeline. I am said to be much less evil than my counterpart, but you haven't seen me before my first cup of coffee in the morning.
.

Is Mr. Liker here in the Vatican? Has he been beatified?


Not yet. But he's here all right. Last I saw him he was heading down into the basement to look for pizza.

The basement? That's never good.

Um. .... Maybe you four better come with me.


Mmm. Some people call it a sling blade. I call it a kaiser blade.